Portfolio Negotiations Revealed for Liberal-National-Reform Government

A shocking revelation has come today as Saltcon has received an exclusive leak of portfolio allocation negotiations between Reform and the Liberals. We’ll be going through the whole records of what we have, but here’s the main thing. The National Party was completely absent, represented by Liberals Fresh3001 and Kingethan15. Fresh3001 begins with saying that National will want the portfolios of Finance and Education. alpine- went on to say she would have preferred Finance but “that seems out of reach”. Fresh3001 stated that the government should have many associate portfolios, “so that each party’s agenda in a certain area can be performed by one of their MPs if necessary, i.e a Reform associate justice minister can submit a key Reform justice bill”. alpine- pushed for Reform to hold the Associate Finance portfolio. Fresh3001 counteroffered with two Associate Finance Ministers, one for the Liberals and one for Reform, to which alpine- said “[Reform would] rather just have one Associate, you and National are joined at the hip really”.

They then proceeded to move onto the Regions portfolio, with alpine- pushing for Reform to hold the portfolio, to which Fresh3001 responded “[Kingethan15] is big on regions, let’s put that to the side for a sec, that being said I hate the regions”. alpine- agreed to put it aside, and negotiations for the Finance portfolios continued.

Fresh3001 said that “the problem with me not being associate finance is that I can’t officially help do the budget”, and alpine- pointed out as PM he’d almost certainly be involved officially. alpine- and Fresh3001 then agreed to give the Associate Finance portfolio to /u/Timewalker102 of Reform.

They then moved on to the Deputy Prime Minister position. alpine- immediately made it clear that she wanted it. Fresh3001 called it “the big hurdle”, and that it “[couldn’t] be confirmed without [Ninjjadragon]”. They both clarified that the coalition would be a Liberal-National-Reform coalition instead of National being in confidence and supply, but put the issue aside.

They moved on to the Foreign Affairs portfolio. alpine- stated that “I think WW has shown he has a passion and expertise in the area”, and Fresh3001 stated that “Yeah, I was willing to give that up.”

The pair moved on to the Justice portfolio, to which Fresh3001 said “Justice is one that I was going to give to [Mattsthetic], especially considering our prisoner rehab bill”. alpine- pointed out Reform policies in the area, saying she was “gunning for either Education or Justice” and that “if I’m DPM, I should get a big role too”. Fresh3001 said he “definitely wanted associate justice”.

Fresh3001 stated that “our priorities are/were Business, Infrastructure, Justice, Health and Regions”, and that “we’re unfortunately getting left with portfolios that are of little relevance to liberal policy”. They then confirmed that in exchange for the Liberals receiving the Justice portfolio, Reform would receive Internal Affairs, Social Development and Defence.

Fresh3001 then stated the updated list of portfolios, which we’ll be showing too, so our readers have a sense of what’s going on-

Liberal:
Business
Health
Justice
Infrastructure
Regions

National:
Finance
Education
Māori Affairs
Primary Industries

Reform:
Social Development
Defence
Foreign Affairs
Internal Affairs

alpine- then requested the Regions portfolio again in exchange for the Liberals receiving the Culture portfolio, to which Fresh3001 said: “I would abolish [the culture portfolio] if I could”. Fresh3001 stated “I’d give [the Regions portfolio] to you if it were up to me, but I need to run it past [Kingethan15]”.

alpine- then stated, “I think the issue is that National have Finance and Education and our biggest portfolios are FA and Social Dvpt, despite us having the same number of seats”. Fresh3001 asked if she’d give up the Deputy Prime Ministerial position for the Regions portfolio, which alpine- refused.

Kingethan15 then showed up saying “[you’re] not taking my regions”, to which alpine- responded “We’re a party for the regions, it would be an embarrassment if we didn’t get it”. Fresh3001 dubbed this “the fight over the WORST portfolio”. An argument proceeded, in which both alpine- and Kingethan15 flaunted their regional credentials, with alpine- calling Kingethan15 a “cunt” during the argument. Ultimately, they then moved onto the speakership.

alpine- refused to continue as Deputy Speaker, to which Fresh3001 said “at worst we can offload to [AnswerMeNow1]”. The trio entertained the idea of offering the job to the Greens co-leader for a while, with Kingethan15 saying “[AnswerMeNow1] being Speaker isn’t a bad idea, it means he can’t legislate”, with Fresh3001 calling AnswerMeNow1’s bills “shit”.

They then returned to the region’s issue again, with Fresh3001 saying that “if we don’t get regions we need another minor portfolio”. They then discussed creating Associate Regions portfolios or even more minor regions portfolios, which were discarded. alpine- said she’d swap Regions for the Deputy PM spot, meaning Ninjjadragon would not be Deputy Prime Minister. Ultimately, they settled the Regions issue by granting Reform the Primary Industries portfolio and the Liberals the Regions portfolio. They then discussed associate ministers for a while. By the end of this, Fresh had come up with a new list-

Liberals:
PM
Business
Health
Infrastructure
Regions
Primary Industries
Assoc Justice

National:
DPM
Finance
Education
Maori Affairs
Culture
Assoc Defence

Reform:
DPM
Assoc Finance
Justice
Foreign Affairs
Internal Affairs
Social Dvpt
Defence

alpine- was slightly concerned about co-Deputy Prime Ministers, but Fresh3001 said “it’d also be an L for Ninjja to not be [deputy PM].” Both parties had largely agreed on the portfolios, but there was controversy over whether alpine- would be a sole Deputy Prime Minister or whether she’d serve with Ninjjadragon. Both options were offered for the Nationals to decide on, to which alpine- said “I’ll put it this way: Whichever option Ninjja chooses, he’s not going to be DPM – if you catch my drift.” alpine- realised she’d forgotten about the Environmental portfolio, which was granted to National. The parties then hashed out who would be in which position, and that’s where our leaks end.

This is not only interesting, but concerning. Chief of the issue is that no National MP showed up, especially considering that the current candidate for National leadership, ToastinRussian (who could have easily showed up was not present. Not to mention, Fresh3001’s constant disparaging of the regions is very concerning.

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