In a part-expected, part-bombshell statement the Prime Minister today confirmed he doesn’t have the time to be Prime Minister.

This crazy news came today at 8pm just as NubBank suffered catastrophic failure, similar to that which the Government also seems to be suffering.

/u/TheNoHeart presided over a tempered term in office, despite being relatively short. His greatest achievement and the one he will be remembered for will very much be the total dismantling of the Department for Work and Pensions, a policy that was absolutely lambasted by the opposition.

Outpourings of grief flooded twitter for a brief moment before it went back to talking about Doctor Who and Jodie Whittakers insane lack of boobage.

Saltcon attempted to approach the now former Prime Minister for comment, but we were driven off by the rabid dogs (read: Classical Liberals) owned by the Liberal Democrats when we approached the Parliamentary Estate


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